Meanwhile, my self-built PC is still being stroppy and rebooting itself at random intervals. Maybe I should have built one out of K’Nex or something.
4th August 2003
Tomorrow I’m joining a gym. Don’t laugh.
This could either be the best thing I ever did, or the most stupid.
I’ll let you know how it goes.
5th August 2003
The gym wasn’t that bad, actually. I had this fear that it would be like P.E. lessons at school, with me as the constant source of ridicule. It turned out to be exactly the opposite: everyone was really friendly and there was no scowling P.E. teacher giving me a “you disgust me, you fat pig” look.
Day 2 of my week off work and everything is Just Fine™.
7th August 2003
Did the Cambrian Rail Cruise yesterday. Great fun, if you like spending 11 hours on trains. And I do.
Perhaps a mistake to do "tourist-y" lines in the middle of the school holidays though. Far too many screaming kids with harrassed parents: "Darren, sit down! Don’t bang the table! No, there’s no snack trolley! The man’s coming! He’ll throw you off!" — tip for parents: this NEVER works, because after the first time you say it, the kid sees that there is no "man" and realises that it’s an empty threat.
Then there was that rude woman at Shrewsbury who impatiently said, “are you coming through or not?” when I was standing aside to let her past — bitch.
Who was it who said the biggest problem with public transport was the public?
10th August 2003
My TV listings guide describes this Tuesday’s episode of Brookside as follows: "Stuart struggles to use the toilet his dad’s ashes were flushed down."
You couldn’t make this stuff up.
12th August 2003
Nobody is looking at this site (usual suspects aside). I could get a bigger audience by printing out this page and taping it to my front door.
Back when I did that other site, I craved a mass audience. I even had one of those lame FastCounters and would check it every single day. But the sad fact was, I had about 6 regular viewers (just like BBC Three).
13th August 2003
Everybody go and pre-order this now.
14th August 2003
Ah, the A-Level results are out. If you got your results today, don’t let any arguments over exams getting easier dull the shiny sheen of your achievement, or something like that.
Of course, I dropped out of school and didn’t do my A-Levels. In fact, on the day my former classmates were getting their results, I was at the dentist’s having a tooth taken out, and hence spent most of the day in a heavy drug-induced slumber. Then I watched Dallas on UK Gold 2.
That was what I like to call “the lowest point”.
18th August 2003
Well, what a complete waste of time that weekend was. I went to the gym on Friday to find that it was closed due to "unforeseen problems". I am a creature of routine, and the only person allowed to vary that routine is me — I hate it when external circumstances change my plans for me.
Then Saturday and Sunday I was just sick as a dog. It started on Saturday afternoon with headaches and general nausea. By Saturday night I was lying in bed feeling totally awful. And of course, I was all well and good by the time Monday morning (and work) came around! And now I’m home from work, I feel lousy again.
There’s only one rational conclusion: bacteria and fitness centres have it in for me. It’s a conspiracy!
21st August 2003
They showed series 3, then bounced it around the schedules and eventually took it off. After hundreds of people complained, they relented and… they showed series 4, then bounced it around the schedules and eventually took it off.
24th August 2003
Cartoon Network have started running trails pointing out that this September will be their 10th anniversary of broadcasting to the UK.
I remember when they started, it was all Jonny Quest and Captain Planet. Oh, and The Plastic Man Comedy Adventure Show.
That was ten years ago, and I was 11 years old. In a little under two weeks I celebrate (if that’s the right word) my 21st birthday. Suddenly I feel old.
26th August 2003
Who the hell buys underwear on eBay?
29th August 2003
Who says advertising doesn’t work? I can’t get that stupid 11 88 88 advertising jingle out of my head. I’ve been humming it to myself all day.
Wonder if they can give me the number for Dial-A-Life? 🙂
“# Double One, Double Eight, Double Eight! #”
30th August 2003
Simon Dawkins speaks!
Hey – I`m the headmaster man, didnt you know? I still rock it up good when I`m not on my beds if you know what i mean!
I still sit in my office and summon the totty outside whenever I feel like it. I have a special button I press and it randomly sends an invite to one of them – BUT I NEVER KNOW WHICH!
Then I just wait for them to come – then I come as well! Mwha ha ha.
— Someone’s having fun on the MTS section of Friends Reunited.