Robert Hampton

Another visitor! Stay a while… stay forever!

3rd October 2004

I. fucking. hate. dogs.
Posted by at 12.57pm | No responses | Uncategorised

What is it about dog owners that renders them incapable of keeping their pets under control? Why is it that when I go for a simple stroll in the park I’m set upon by various breeds, sniffing, yapping, nipping at my heels while their owners stand twenty feet away meekly calling, "Fluffy! (WHISTLE) Here boy!" and then, on seeing my dirty look, have the gall to say, "he’s just being friendly"

This morning was the clincher, when a dog (I don’t know the breed, one of those ugly ones, not that it narrows it down much) pulled away from its owner’s lead and lunged straight for me, sinking its teeth into me. The bite wound is only superficial, but still… I can do without this on a Sunday morning, really.

To be fair, his owner wrestled the dog away and apologised profusely, which just about stopped me from unleashing an uncharacteristic torrent of verbal abuse.

My message to all dog owners: if you want an uncontrollable creature who makes a mess all over everything, get rid of the dog and have children instead. It’s much safer for other people.

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