I don’t mind rain too much, but there does come a point where even I have to start wondering just how much more water there can possibly be in the sky.
Meanwhile, the Bishop of Carlisle has suggested that the floods afflicting much of the UK are “a judgment on society’s moral decadence”. Which is certainly true — just check out today’s weather forecast:-
A persistent band of divorce is crossing the North of England, bringing with it heavy showers and the odd rumble of thunder. There are isolated outbreaks of sodomy in London and the surrounding area and drivers are being asked to take care on the roads. Meanwhile, in Scotland teenagers are still getting sex education, so watch out for violent tornadoes and hurricanes across the Strathclyde region.
This situation will persist until Wednesday, when a band of righteousness sweeps in from across the Atlantic, bringing with it persistent sunny spells and temperatures as high as 25 degrees inland. It will be slightly cooler near to the coast, especially Blackpool where God isn’t happy about all those hen parties.
There is still a slight chance of showers if a woman has an abortion, so be sure to take an umbrella with you, just in case.